I am so used to comfort, my ease, my not wanting to stretch myself much. I am so used to comfort, that I now want even Love to be user friendly. Wow. Never heard something like that before! User friendly Love! I thought Love stretches itself in all directions it feels pulled towards. I thought [...]
Living as a slave or King..
A whole life time is passed, listening, obeying and being a slave to the expectations and demands of someone inside me, which I think to be myself. I drain my energies, run a whole day, after people, after jobs, after money, after relationships, in a wishful thinking that if I fulfill the demands and wants [...]
Failing myself, how can I help others..
Question: I am still not able to maintain the right attitude in my own sadhana and yet I try to pose as an adviser and instructor. Well, one can give good advice even when one does not follow it oneself—there is the old adage “Do what I preach and not what I practise.” More seriously, [...]
Tendencies and understanding
Tendencies (limited patterns of behaviour and of thinking) can and do coexist together with the light of understanding. Often times we see, when I see that I understand what is right for me and what is not, even then I find myself on the crossroads with a bundle of tendencies, of limiting patterns of behaviour [...]
To be interested or not..
What would interest a drunkard? Alcohol. Satsang will not really interest him. Right? What will interest an addict? The object of his addiction, of course. But that does not say that being interested in alcohol or any object of my addiction is good for me per se. I just am so obsessed with being interested [...]
Die everyday..
I die everyday, everyday I die, to the ones I love, and like, to the things I love to do, to my likes and dislikes. I die everyday and am reborn, to experience you afresh, to experience me afresh, to experience the various things, to experience life itself. For I see that if I don't [...]
Remember and Offer
Remember and Offer: The Mother (Pondicherry) Many times in our life, and especially on the spiritual path, (where one is consciously becoming more and more aware of the subtle movements of the being, even mild ripples of the being are noticed, and cannot escape the eye of witnessing presence) things happen, movement is noticed in [...]
Ordeals – shortest way to the Divine
Be grateful for all ordeals. They are the shortest way to the Divine : The Mother In normal life, we try our best to avoid ordeals. We try to take all the possible routes so that we do not have to face much ordeals, but alas! As if an unseen hand knows the best. We [...]
Quality of my mind and my life..
The quality of my mind reflects the quality of my life. The quality of my life reflects the quality of my mind. If I want to change my life, I will have to look at the quality of my mind. If I want to change the quality of my mind, I will have to look [...]
We are more than the wounds..
She had stabbed her hand by mistake, a few months ago.. It happened while she was getting the coconut out from its shell. Something happened, and in an instant the sharp knife was in her hand, a bit deeper. So, it could not be called a cut or a scrape off, but better a stab! [...]
Intimate relationships..
In intimate relationships, there is something that happens, which does not usually happen in all other relationships. We begin to look at ourself from other person's eyes. We place our sense of self-worth in other person's hands. If he loves me, I feel loved. If he abandons me, I feel abandoned. If he cares for [...]
When the weather turns nice..
And when the weather turns seeming nice, And showers it's bounty, it's light, it's warmth, it's embrace over me, I will not get addicted to these bright images only, I will not want more and more of these bright bounties now.. For I have seen YOU in all the misery and conflict too... For I [...]
All I have is conflicts..
I look at myself, and ask... What of me shall I share with the world!! And I don't see anything worthy in me, Of sharing... I just see conflicts, and I see confusions, I see misery and I see strife... And I doubt my self -giving to this world, So I stay shut, shelled, I [...]
When you get the call…
And when you get a call from your true home, Don't say let me finish this and then.. Don't procrastinate going home for a moment... Don't say let me finish the chore for today, and then.. Just heed the call and respond immediately, Just know the call, and go for the holy dip, urgently, For [...]
Why do you stay in prison?
Beginning the post with these two lines from Rumi's poem - "Why do you stay in prison When the door is so wide open!" ------------ Why do we feel suffocated, limited, trapped, in our own lives? What is the prison?? The prison of the thought. The prison of my limited sense-perception. The prison of my [...]
To follow the mind Or not..
On this path of taking the whole of life as yoga, as sadhana, as an exploration, very often we fall into a trap of following our mind.. We see that we find clarity by listening to some words, or reflecting in silence, or discussing things out with a friend, but as the pattern of old [...]
The games that we play..
Are we not aware of the games that we play, The hide and seek that we play with each other, The dramas that we enact, The superior and inferior images that we put ourselves into! Are we not aware? Are we not tired now, of these games that we play? And if we are, then [...]
Life as an exploration!?
There are experiences in life, which one can easily move on from, letting them slip from us. And then, there are experiences in life which are very sticky, they seem to stick very tightly. A place where you invested yourself too much, and ended up getting exhausted by that investing your energies there... will, sooner [...]
Immersing the mind in Truth
Often times in our life, when we begin the journey back to our Truth, back to our true being, back to knowing, realising who we truly are...... we fall a pray to older patterns of life, old habits of mind, body and feelings, and no wonder that one feels really lost, not knowing which way [...]
Meeting – ‘Missing you’
I miss you, but I know with certitude that I am okay without you, I miss you, but I do not feel incomplete without you, At times, I still may miss you, just like that! And at times I may not miss you at all. And that is okay too. I know I am whole [...]
Be there for yourself!
In a wish to love others we often forget ourselves. In a wish to be close to others, we often abandon our own being. And we wonder why on earth do I feel lost, lonely, as if no one is there for me!!! We go out to shower our love and care on others, while [...]
We are the space..
There's nothing wrong with that sense of lack showing up... Let it be, let it be. There's nothing wrong with sadness, loss, pain, grief... Let it be, let it be... While you remain open and allowing as the space itself. Space doesn't shoo the visitors away, it neither entertains them..it just is...allowing .. And in [...]
Sadness, a visitor…
Sadness visited me today, The reasons exactly she did not declare, I did not interrogate much too, I just noticed her presence, And a few hints as to why it may be there, And then I did not struggle with it, I did not shoo it away, or began fighting with her, I did not [...]
Using ‘hurt’ as a signal..
More often than not, we keep one investing our time and effort and energies in investing our love towards people, while we keep on getting hurt in the process. It is an act of self love, and kindness towards oneself, when we stop investing ourselves at all those places where we get a feeling of [...]
The wound…
It hurt, below her eye, as she saw herself walk through those alleys. Felt like a little pricky sore below the eye... She thought of putting something over that little pricky spot, appeared like a wound, tiny little wound. Her hands went directly to a little bottle kept on her bedside. She took the herbal [...]
Be the empty Presence..
When the wave of stories come back surging... All those hurts, wounds, resurface and ask you to think them, to do something about them.. to get involved and fix them.. Be like the empty space.. Offer them no resistance at all.. Do not become the brick wall of resistance, saying: No, why are you still [...]
When sadness comes..
My friend... When sadness comes, And the mood becomes sad... Remind yourself.. You are 'not' the sad one.. You are not the 'mood', You are the space in which the sadness, and the mood can be.. Take a moment and fall back, sink back, into this remembrance of who you are... The Light that sees [...]
Right now..
Walking is happening, the shadow of the walker is seen, and a thought comes, and almost captures the walking.. The thought says, 'I' am the one walking. So called successes and failures are happening... And a thought comes and seizes the happening.. and says, 'I am the one who succeeded, I am the one who [...]
Search for happiness…
Life presents us with a certain experience, and owing to whatever, we feel happy, elated, joyous. The situation 'may seem' to be caused by a person, an activity, an experience, a situation, etc etc. One enjoys that experience. And the mind wants to have that experience again, as obviously, happiness is something all of us [...]
Storm on surface and calm deep within…
When confusion overwhelms, Life appears burdensome, heavy, And you cannot connect the dots together of happenings... stay put. stay put.... Know, that in the depths of the ocean, there is still calm, even when the storms are raging on the surface... Don't wait for the surface to get mellowed... Don't shoo the storm away, don't [...]
The bounty of life..
Take a moment to tune into abundance of life, Take a moment to acknowledge what taste life is presenting to you right now.. It may be a taste of 'losing a loved one' or a taste of 'disappointment' or a taste of 'arising of complaints' or a taste of 'losing a friendship' or a taste [...]
कुछ होने की चाहत मेंतेरे चरणों को न गवां दूं मैं ये चाह है क्यों?ये भी अर्पण, ये भी अर्पण। अपनी बातें तू ही जाने,ये मन तन जीवनतुझको अर्पण क्या हूं मैं और नहीं हूं क्याये क्यों कर भला फिर जानू मैं? जो तेरा था वो तू ही रख,जो मैं ने मेरा सोचा, वह सोच [...]
Do not abandon yourself…
When life is hard, each day becomes a struggle, When pain is too much, and disappointments galore, When the future dreams lie shattered, broken, and past haunts too much, Do not forget to.... Breathe...Breathe.... Breathe into all that...... For, these are the times you need yourself the most.. Do not abandon yourself for a saviour [...]
Forever safe
When life seems dim, the dreams shatter, When plans fail and a dream breaks, Remember to rest, To rest with all the brokenness in the arms of life.. the deep vast embrace of life.. That never was away, that never was not there... As we were busy in building thought castles, dreams, we forgot the [...]
Meeting life first hand..
There is nothing wrong with feeling lonely, It's allowed to be...you don't have to shoo it away at all... There's nothing wrong with feeling lost, abandoned... All alone in this immensely crowded world... Lets meet loneliness.. it's just a friend, Needs a little room in your vast embrace.. Don't go by the face value or [...]
Timelessness and time
Today, there is another visitor in the room, It's another little clock. It rhymes somehow, with the clock on the wall... Feels as if they know each other, already... They are making music together in time.. Tick tick tock tock... Though they represent to me that time is moving on, on and on... Yet somehow [...]
Alchemy of pain
This pain that is granted to me, I take as a gift of our closeness. I take it as a gift, a remembrance, that I was touched deeply.. This pain that is granted to me, Now i have made friends with; I tried to get rid of it initially, But it never worked. So I [...]
For once, do nothing at all…
They kept on saying, move on... move on... but you saw, you were not able to move on... The pain was great, the loss unbearable, the wound was raw and fresh.. What if I tell you, you can allow pain to break you, What if I tell you, there is nowhere else to move on... [...]
Being available to life…
The Mind keeps on creating picture perfect images of how life should be, how life shouldn't be. But Life happens in the here and now. Life doesn't care for the images of the mind, for the stories of the mind.. It just doesn't bother much about mind's plans. While Life keeps on happening in the [...]
Deep allowance…
They told me to move on, to let go, They told me, to forget you, They told me that I am attached, And I shouldn't be.. I couldn't move on. I couldn't let go. They told me, not to long for you, Not to miss you, And let past go. I couldn't. And now, when [...]
Burning bridges..
Sometimes, when the past troubles too much, and the future dreams lie shattered, one needs to burn the bridges.. to take back all the meanings to things, situations, people, that were given, as if in a dream.. Sometimes, when the past hurts much, and the dreams of future shattered, break our heart.. one needs to [...]
The visitors..
I can live, with some wants unfulfilled, some desires, unfulfilled, some expectations unmet, some demands not granted... I can live, yes, with all of that... I can allow all these visitors, a place in my being, pain, confusion, doubts, misery, struggle, hollowness, unworthiness, or their seeming opposites, they are all welcome, in this wide open [...]
To live with a paining heart..
Each one of us has his own unique pains and aches. The reasons may be innumerable and all of them appear very very valid, there is no denying that. How to cruise through life, with so much of pain? Sometimes the pain may become unbearable, sometimes it is relatively easier. It's paining. I feel my [...]
Decoding signals of this play..
The I tendency or the ego, wants to stick. It is incomplete in its very nature, and seeks completion. So, it tends to join with anything that it lays its hands on- A person, a relation, a job, a child, a family, a concept of self, images, future, past, definitions, labels, dogmas, rewards, identities, money, [...]
Be kind to yourself..
For once, be kind to yourself. Say, say it out, the NO, if needed, 10,000 times. Say it shamelessly, if that is your truth. Say YES as many times as necessary, Shamelessly, if that is your truth. The world will always appear to barge in, As much space as you allow, It will keep on [...]
A stranger…
There is a stranger who lives in me, I do not know much about her. But I know she is there. I know that she is. Through all that I go through, through all that I do, act, I get to know a bit about her, just a little bit more. It feels she is [...]
What you possess, you lose..
I do something, which I feel I must not have done, I say something which I feel I must not have said, I make an act, which I feel I must not have done, And then I get absorbed, more and more in myself, thinking of myself, of how bad am I, how guilty am [...]
Different stances, being in pain..
Different stances of being in pain: 1. I am in pain, emotional pain. The reason for my pain is that there is something external that I am inclined towards and I am not getting it. And my yearning is intense. Yearning can also be to resolve an entanglement from the past or a worry of the future or present. I do [...]
She knew…
As she was growing up, as if directly or indirectly, she was always being told, of what is expected of her, how to live, making people happy around you, behaving well, the responsibilities, the duties.. etc.etc. Why did she not question? Why did she not wonder? Why must I behave in that way only, why [...]
The kid in us..
There is a little child in us. Very stubborn. Very demanding. It just can jump up any time and begin demanding, put forward a seeming little demand. It feels that when the demand will be fulfilled, it will feel better. All our life, through this way or the other way, we keep on being a [...]
Maaya- that which sticks to the mind….
All that is on the domain of mind is "maaya" - illusion- that which appears to be, but is not. Kabir ji says - "जो मन से ना उतरे, माया कहिए सोय" - all that goes on in the head, throughout the day, throughout the life, is maaya. If we look closely - what all [...]
Let Thy Will be done and not mine.
Usually, the way we live, we say, let my will be done, and only mine. Whatever we plan for our life, whatever we expect from people, from life, from situations, must come true. Only that must come true. If it doesn't come true, I feel hurt, disappointed and drained of energy. I feel depressed if [...]
Being free of the role, I can enjoy the whole experience..
We struggle managing our relationships. We struggle, expecting things from others, and we struggle with their expectations too from us in that role. If I am stuck in the role of being the wife, i can be sure that I will be getting annoyed, irritated, frustrated, when things happen or circumstances happen. Because no matter [...]
Creating our suffering..
A man felt he lost his house key. He went on searching throughout the world, he could not find it. He kept on suffering when he could not find his key in the world. He did not give up. Neither did he take our time to reflect, to step back, to ponder, am i looking [...]
I love you
I love you But you don't belong to me. I don't own you. I see, that the moment I think I own you, or you are mine, or you belong to me, I see that then I begin to overpower, I may even hurt, abuse, or constrict you. I don't want to do that to [...]
Being & Becoming..
I am THAT And at the same time, I am anger, frustration, hatred, envy, pride, and all the rest.. I am unborn, never changing, And at the same time, I am ever changing. I am the Light, And at the same time, Full of darkness... I am the clarity, the light of understanding, And at [...]
The load on my chest..
There was this load on my chest, Some burden, Some heaviness, Not knowing where it was coming from, Just wishing for it to get lighter.. Didn't know what to do, Didn't know the cause, It just was there. So I prayed. I remembered the Divine, Called upon the Divine, First, began by asking what's the [...]
Airplane mode..
I am sure, half of us landing up here on the blogpost, must be intrigued by the topic itself ! 🙂 Let's see, uncover, what this has to offer.. All of us know about the mobile phone in Airplane mode. I will be talking here of the airplane mode, without the wifi on. So, you [...]
Being and becoming..
I see that I am a continuous process... like a river, like a stream.. Many things come up, sometimes I feel I understand, sometimes I feel I don't, deeper and deeper layers reveal themselves to me.. gradually, in time.. I see, So much of me lies hidden from me.. and is uncovered only in time.. [...]
Courage
For some, courage is to become able to say a long awaited NO. For some, courage is to gather force to say a difficult YES. For some, courage is to find the strength to hold on, between a Yes and a No. For some, courage is to move on. For some, courage is to hang [...]
Inner Truth, Rejection, desires and freedom.
All of us have an Inner Truth, an inner guidance, like an inner signal which we must follow. As children, we are in direct touch with the Inner Truth. Whatever is in sync with the Inner Truth, is accepted, is allowed, and whatever is not in sync with Inner Truth is not allowed, is rejected. [...]
And we kept living yesterdays
While today waited, with a clean plate, a clean slate, While today waited, afresh, anew, innocent, in wonderment.. While today waited with a new dawn, with new vivid colours.. We were busy, extremely busy, And serious, very serious, We had something really important at hand. We just kept living the yesterdays. How could we leave [...]
Allowing space..
In order to make up for time, We keep doing a lot harm than good... This has to be done, that has to be done, All of that has to be done... As if in a race against time, we indulge in back to back activities, mindless, thoughtless, heartless .. More harm than good... Can [...]
The Divine sculptor
Just as a piece of rock, Undergoes the pain, Of being chiseled and carved... Go on, O amorphous being, Let yourself be shaped, be carved, be refined, Let yourself being rid of all the thicker, grosser, denser parts, Let yourself be carved off the rock you are born with.. It will hurt, it will pain, [...]
Words…
Sometimes, a lot can be blabbered, A lot can be said, On what happened, Why it had to happen, Why must it happen, And how it happened the way it happened. A lot can be discussed.. But it seems, All that is nothing but a waste of words, Of words .... which can do wonders... [...]
I choose..
I see someone in me, all ready to be ugly, evil, dark, and I see someone in me only, ready to choose, not to go that way. I see someone in me, full of evil, full of dark thoughts, and I see someone in me only, ready to choose, not to go that way. Why [...]
There is someone..
There is someone.. I dont know who that someone is, I dont know much of the characteristics.. But that someone is a reality am sure.. And that someone, just pushes me, Further and further... No matter, how many times I fail, No matter how many mistakes I commit, That someone just keeps me pushing further.. [...]
What is an emotion?
Usually our mind is a space, where thoughts can freely come, wander about, make that place their home, their washroom, all that. That is what at the moment our mind is. Looted by thoughts. Then comes emotion. Emotions are intense. They have energy with them, they are strong, intense. When I support a thought / [...]
I am..the….
I am very smart Very clever, very calculative.. I feel I know the best, always, I feel what I know is exactly the way how things must be, how people must behave... I make and create stories, and based on them, I make my puppet live a life.. The puppet suffers, badly, his heart cannot [...]